Ghost In The Shell: The Philosophy of Humanity for Dummies

It is said that, to sell any foreign entity to an American audience, one must first know those consuming the product to begin with. Are you trying to sell Mexican food? Mix together some random combination of meat, cheese or vegetable and give it a Spanish name. Trying to sell a Japanese role playing game to the American public? Simplify the combat system and translate the dialog. And, best of all, trying to sell a story that argues about the nature of their own humanity? Bog it down with backhanded commercialism comments and add some pretty scenery. If Ghost in the Shell is any indication, the Japanese have long ago mastered this particular art.

Okay, to be nice, Ghost in the Shell is a pretty awesome movie from a strictly cyberpunk/sci-fi standpoint. The original message of the 1995 anime (What Makes Us Human?) is still there and, although dumbed down for mass consumption, does feature moments of philosophical brilliance. The story, though mixed together with limited success with not only remnants of the '95 movie but also the late 90s TV series, still manages to pull off something resembling a cohesive and immersive plot. The characters range from decent mirror images (Batou) to straight-up improvements over their source material (Aramaki). Throw in a setting and overall oppressive feeling of a world tinted with a fresh coat of paint to cover up its unpleasant underbelly and you have a movie that tries and mostly succeeds in at least being a cliff notes version of the property. Regardless of your opinions on the casting or even the need for this property to exist in live-action, you can't deny that the production didn't skimp over details when it came to giving you something pretty to look at.

Unfortunately, while it is a very well-shot movie filled with some deep-rooted philosophies, the movie ultimately fails on its insistence on focusing solely on the image rather than the brain. Yes, The Major (Scarlett Johanssen) is a lot of fun to watch in action, but she's mostly just playing a blank slate (a literal amnesiac) with the occasional doubts about her own humanity. Yes, Kazu (Michael Pitt) is an interesting villain with a sympathetic story and a few interesting twists to go along with it, but he doesn't really have much of a point out of being a catalyst for Major's own awakening. Even the city, so well rendered and full of unique sites, gets stale after the fiftieth freaking pan shot because the filmmakers apparently couldn't think of a better way to do screen transition. I get it! The city looks cool! You don't have to keep proving it to me every time you want send me somewhere else!

As for watching it, did you watch the original and wish there was more humor to go along with its dour tale of humanity lost? This will offer enough moments of levity to at least feel more entertaining than the original's rather depressing plot. Did you love the original and, as a knee-jerk reaction, spit on any attempt to recreate that particular tone? This probably won't change your mind and you could find better uses of your time trying to figure out how to get over yourself.

Rupert Sanders (Snow White and The Hunstman) continues to make visually stunning, if thematically flawed, movies that pretty much no one asks for with Ghost in the Shell, a cyberpunk-themed story about how being human doesn't necessarily involve humanity. Fatally injured in a terrorist attack, The Major (Johanssen) is augmented to the point of near complete machine and put to work fighting cyberterrorists. Along the way, she will realize that everything about her may or may not be a lie, Aramaki (Takeshi Kitano) will be the most awesome version of himself ever and the soul of the original will be lost in translation in exchange for a by-the-numbers action movie with only hints of the whole darkness-of-the-human-soul stuff Japan doesn't seem to have any problems with. Hey, looks cool, though!

My score: 5/10. So...did anyone else notice that The Major is actually an Asian woman inside the body of a white woman? Isn't that kind of like sidestepping the “whitewashing” puddle just to fall of a freaking cliff?

Power Rangers: Fixing Old Problems

If you, like me, were a kid in the early 90s, chances are you heard of Saban's Power Rangers, a Fox Kids staple that featured bad stereotypes of teenagers who used their karate powers to operate giant dinosaur robots in their eternal battle with Moon monsters. While I'll admit that last part in the description sounds ridiculously awesome, the show never quite reached its potential as a watchable series mainly because 1.) the dialog was laughably bad, 2.) none of the main characters were anything short of bad 90s stereotypes (the funny one, the smart one, the hot one, the leader) and, regardless of how hard I tried, 3.) I just couldn't find a real world scenario where five attractive, smart and athletic “teenagers” could be possibly bullied by an overweight greaser and his moronic sidekick (that's Bulk and Skull in case you were wondering). In the end, the human element never felt real because any characterization always came off as forced or written by someone who'd never even met a teenager. Now, with that particular franchise run into the ground (almost 20 seasons of this stuff!) and Saban Studios seemingly desperate to relive the “good times”, we've been given Power Rangers, the first iteration in the franchise that actually feels like the writers knew what they were doing. And it's awesome!

Yes, Power Rangers, despite being based on one of the dumbest kids shows of the 90s (an era dedicated to dumb kids shows), has somehow managed to bottle lightning and become far more awesome that its predecessor could ever hope. The characters are likable and display actual depth, the script seems to realize how bad of an idea its inception was and actually tries to fix its most glaring problems, Elizabeth Banks is fun and campy as Rita Repulsa, the action is fluid and the dialog doesn't feel like it was written by a childless thirty-year-old. Throw in a straight-faced Bryan Cranston as Zordon and ACTUAL BACKSTORIES for everyone and you have what Saban should have done twenty years ago: write smarter scripts and rely on your audience's intelligence.

Unfortunately, while the movie works great as an origin story, the actual “morphing” into multi-colored ninja warriors and flying giant mech parts still reeks of a property woefully connected to its past. While its not all bad (there's a pretty awesome Rita vs. giant robot moment that's perfect in its build up and execution), its still sad that the franchise succeeded so well in making believable characters just to skimp on the crazy monster fights at the end. Oh well, at least you have interesting kids fighting monsters this time.

As for watching it, do you remember growing up with this tripe in the nineties? Chances are you've either booked tickets far in advance or renounced all connection to that series permanently and are, thereby, confined to that opinion regardless of what I say. Have you only heard of Power Rangers in minor passing references and always wondered what all the fuss is about? This would be a much better starting point than the T.V. Series. Pick how you want to watch Karate-infused teenagers fight monsters, I guess.

Dean Israelite (Project Almanac) tries to get away from bad found footage movies with pretty resounding success with Power Rangers, a movie that didn't have to be as good as it was for a reboot. Basically, five teenagers stumble across karate powers and use them to fight monsters while wearing tights, driving giant dinosaur robots and kicking rock monsters in the face. Yeah, its actually as awesome as it sounds. Go for it.

My score: 8/10. There have been many great lines in movies over the last century, yet I am hard pressed to find a better recent one than, “We have to stop Rita from destroying the Krispy Kreme!” That's like Shakespeare for millennials there...